spodgod

I wonder if 2010 will be the year that mainstream marketing starts to understand the reach of online publishing. A recent exchange I had doesn’t bode well for it:

“Hi Kyle,” barked the PR guy on the other end of the line, “[COMPANY NAME] accidentally emailed us your request to try out a [GADGET NAME]”.

“Um, OK,” I said.

“We represent [DIFFERENT COMPANY NAME] and were wondering if you’d like to look at a [ANOTHER GADGET NAME] too”.

“Um, OK,” I said.

“You could probably do a round-up in Spiffy Widgets Magazine,” he said eagerly, completely misunderstanding how technology journalism actually works.

“Well, actually, I just write for the web site,”

“Oh,” he said, a little sadly, “Do you think you can get something into print?”

“Not in Spiffy Widgets Magazine,” I said.

“Do you write for anyone else?” he asked, a little desperately.

“Yes, I do. Web Thing Monthly, Shiny PC, Computer and Video Insides…”

“Yeah, yeah,” he interrupted. Then, sighing, said, “OK, we’ll get a handset out to you by the end of the week. Bye, Kevin”.

“Cool. Do you need my address?”

Click. Brrrrrrrrr.

• Gift for parents assembled from leftover sweets, alcohol & hotel snatchings. Not because we forget – we just couldn't afford anything else. #
• Slightly incensed by consumerist preoccupation with children opening your presents. I have taken your names, for the revolution. #
• People who follow me in an attempt to publicise their software/hardware/service do themselves no favours by unfollowing moments later… #
• Squee! Old news, but new to me: The Coen brothers are remaking True Grit with Jeff Bridges; http://bit.ly/4oOP5O #
• Just discovered the only person I know who's been using the web longer than me is on Twitter: @timberners_lee #
• Has any artist in any medium f**ked up as spectacularly as the Wachowski brothers did with the Matrix sequels? #
• Research question: Has anyone successfully used Late Payment of Commercial Debts Act to expedite payment? #
• Seems council were listening after all – gritter has just been down my road, day after I emailed. First time in seven years I've lived here! #
• Looking on the bright side, I might lose a bit of weight this Christmas. #
• Caught up with "Defying Gravity" last night. If you've missed episodes, don't bother. Wait for BBC3's "Being Human" in the New Year instead. #
• Free movie rental from BlinkBox, via @digitalspy: http://www.blinkbox.com/DigitalSpy #
• .@caitlinmoran reminds me that I should really go and see Macca before he stops touring http://bit.ly/7qKhUD #
• How SF author Paolo Bacigalupi followed William Gibson's advice and broke into writing fiction, via @greatdismal: http://bit.ly/4vHdhr #
• Another free Xmas MP3 from the Santaphobia archives. This one's suitable for work (but may make you soil yourself): http://bit.ly/santatown #
• Last copy of the year submitted. The tax return can wait until tomorrow. We're snowed in and BBC iPlayer beckons. #
• Didn't send cards this year so here's a free Christmas song instead: (Parental Guidance: Very Offensive Lyrics): http://bit.ly/babyjeebus #
• Come to think of it, I'm a bit bemused by the fact that people *with* bookings are still turning up… #eurostar #
• Why are people without bookings still turning up at the Eurostar terminal? Don't they have tellies? #
• Thinking seriously about switching to Vodafone when my Orange contract runs out in, ooh, TWO MILLION YEARS TIME. #
• Genius -> RT @bobrudge Next year's campaign should be to get this year's Joe McElderry single to number one. #
• No Metallica on Spotify. What a surprise. #

• Taking the afternoon off. Fish finger sandwich. Mug of tea. Dollhouse. Bliss. #
• Like that @pdouglas always takes time to acknowledge receipt of copy. What a gent! #
• Just caught Wogan bidding farewell to his listeners. A bit cheesy – but the old chap's all choked up. Can't help but be moved. #
• Just found out that all this week's earnings will be spent on fitting a new water pump to the car. If I was religious, I would shun my God. #
• .@ruskin147 Had a few pieces in Technology Guardian – then "Online" – in the early '00s. Carefully archived in my cuttings collection. #
• RT @ruskin147: Sad day : last printed edition of Technology Guardian, after more than 25 years. #
• Credit crunch Christmas: Switched from Laphroaig to Sainsbury's Islay Pure Malt – for xmas booze buy in. Not fricking bad. A tenner cheaper. #
• It's not snowing here. But, I was snowed in for two weeks last year, if that helps you put your half inch of slush into perspective. #
• An ITV journalist just described military funding deficit as "ginormous". In other news, a man had a boo boo & went away in an ambleeance. #
• Writing PHP tutorials. Been a while, but it's just like riding a bike. A bike that pedals backwards and has no saddle. #
• Looking forward to not having to read a pretentious novel about bad things happening to middle class people tonight. Or ever again. #
• In an era where new music is easier to find than ever, Sting says new music is harder to find than ever: http://bit.ly/5phfwF #

• Before the comedy awards, I may have tried a Crabbies Ginger Beer. Now I'd rather suck on the deodorising cube from Nick Griffin's urinal. #
• I'm too much of a snob to admit I'm watching the X-Factor – but if Stacey doesn't win, it'll be a travesty. #
• "Fun, friendly and interactive" three words guaranteed to make me not turn up for your workshop. #
• I know that might sound like a cool and kooky thing. Diplomatically, as a fiction writer, at least it makes for good material. #
• My girlfriend's Dad is driving her to the train station in a 1930s Austin 7. Her family are like something out of a Wes Anderson movie. #
• Spotify appears to have a sizable chunk of Paul McCartney's back catalogue. Not that I'm listening to it or anything. Ahem. #
• Catching up on The Wire while @ruthellenbrown's away. Don't think I can manage 24 more episodes tonight though. #
• RT @danoliver: Is this Men's Health cover re-hash story genuine? Can't be! Can it? I hope it is. Muhahas all round. http://bit.ly/6cOXae #
• Girlfriend gone for four hours and I'm already eating cake. Doesn't bode well for the other forbidden items on the list. #
• via @saturngirl http://www.kirstieslostring.co.uk <– If I found it, I'd put it on eBay and give the proceeds to a charity for the homeless. #
• Girlfriend has gone away for two days. Parting words were "no cake, no alcohol and no porn". #
• RT @linseyfryatt: Schoolkids get free iPhones: http://bit.ly/6KaE6z <– Jammy little gits. #
• .@pdouglas I get regular emails with minutes detailing the inner bureaucracy of a mid-west American hospital. They're quite boring though. #
• Today, I will attempt to leave Huddersfield. As the success or failure thereof relies upon Network Rail, I rate my chances at 3 out of 10. #
• TV's Floella Benjamin endorses my local Lib Dem candidate. Well, that's swung my vote. Labour it is. #
• I have no interest at all in the Facebook movie. I think this makes me a bad tech journalist, but a culturally discerning human being. #
• Waited at station an hour for train with unspecified delay. It turned up unheralded just as I was getting my refund. Thanks, Network Rail. #
• If I was on School of Saatchi, I would make a 20 foot square collage of Charles Saatchi's face from vaginas cut out of jazz mags. #
• RT @garymarshall: Off to the BBC to talk about headphones I can't afford. <– The very essence of tech journalism in the 00s #
• "We are, indeed, drifting into the arena of the unwell". #
• Not exactly a muso audience either. They clapped along to "Feed the World". #
• So, Midge Ure unplugged last night: Some great songs and he's still got a stunning voice, but no great shakes as a guitarist. #

• The Gmail shortcutastic Gboard – a super-spiffing idea or the Breville sandwich maker of the computer gadget world? http://bit.ly/gboard #
• Going to see Midge Ure "unplugged" tonight. Curious to see how 80s electro-pop will translate to acoustic guitar. #
• Black tie with a black shirt? Gordon Ramsey dresses like an 10 year old at an 80s birthday party. #
• Someone should write an ebook on how to build a working time machine from commonly found household items. I'd buy it. #
• Switching to Google DNS for review purposes. 8.8.8.8 – no problem remembering that. Feel a bit like a traitor to http://www.opendns.com though. #
• .@UKTJPR I'm reminded of Wil Wheaton's motto: "Don't be a dick", because there's never a good enough excuse for treating others badly. #
• Look North's report on Mandelson's nuclear plan not exactly balanced. 10 mins "Investment! Jobs!". 20 seconds grumbling from a hippy. #
• Man "finishes" World of Warcraft… http://bit.ly/8ubgBv #
• New (old) story "Remembrance" posted on Broken English, my fiction blog: http://bit.ly/83yuW5 #
• Ew. Just mentioned Ayn Rand and now I have a bunch of Tories following me. I feel soiled. #
• As an atheist, I'm glad the UK's belief in made-up deities is on the wane. As a human being I'm saddened by the ethical vacuum left behind. #
• Insider tip: When I have lots of software to review, I leave the stuff I like 'til last. That way, exhaustion is neutralised by enthusiasm. #
• Dear BBC, I want the fraction of my license fee back that was used to make "Big Top" please. #
• Incredibly, people still buy CDs. Put 40 on Amazon last night, sold 5 already. Will soon be able to buy some beans to go with my toast. #
• Just finished putting a third of my CD collection on Amazon. I feel like HMV. #
• Tuesday is my Monday – and the to-do list is getting fat. #
• Celebs who Tweet without using the appropriate hashtag, 'cos they don't want to slum it with the plebs #firstagainstthewallcometherevolution #